Being in a leadership position means so much more than having the final say, and holding myself accountable for the growth and direction of the relationship is something that I continuously challenge myself with. When my work schedule evens out in several months (seriously it's been murderous!!!! 36 hour shifts*) I hope to go into more detail with frequent post for the fellas on leadership, dominance, and the lost art of being a gentleman.
I value June's feedback so much, and I would never dream of smothering her or being too overbearing, but the health of our relationship has to come first and I strive to keep that at the forefront of our lives. Ultimately though, I think that is also something that is under-addressed sometimes is that in a D/s relationship that both parties must serve each other and both must sometimes put aside their own desire for the benefit of the relationship as a whole... I love June, and everything about our relationship is a beautiful blessing.
I could probably go on like this forever, but I won't. With the schedule I have, rest comes at a premium, but I promise you that you will all be hearing more from me soon!
Yes! Do you know how refreshing it was to read this? I am so used to reading things in a "I haz teh powaz!" type of mentality. After I finished reading it to Monster, he was so glad to see that there is another couple on the same wavelength as us. :)
ReplyDeleteAs usual, we had the same response and opinion. Growth is such a vital part of any relationship, but it *is* one of those things that most people don't think about. Monster has always said, "without growth you become stagnant. Once a relationship becomes stagnant, if nothing is done to change that, the couple will begin to resent one another." Which, I agree with completely.
I love how you said, "I think that is also something that is under-addressed sometimes is that in a D/s relationship that both parties must serve each other and both must sometimes put aside their own desire for the benefit of the relationship as a whole..."
^ That is so true! Monster serves me just as much as I serve him. Even if it isn't in the same way, it's still serving. I remember a discussion on FL years ago where a sub had posted something along the same lines. She was flamed, horribly, by a lot of D-types for her opinion. It was one of those..."wait, whaaaat" moments. Monster and I had both agreed with her thoughts on it.
He might not be on the same side of the paddles as me, but he serves me by being him. My love, my safe harbor, my brain descatterer, my logical sounding board, my ear and shoulder...this could go on for a while. Lol.
I serve him by being me. His love, his support system, his ear and shoulder, his ragdoll when he needs it, his comfort, his safe harbor, his sounding board.
It's not all kinkiness, it's life and all it entails. The good, the, bad, the ugly, and the sweet. We talk and learn from and with one another. I think I have gone off on a ramble. Lol.
Hope your hours chill out soon and you get a well deserved break. Looking forward to reading more from your viewpoint. :)
Thanks so much for such a well thought out response. I get the sneaking suspicion that you and your Monster are quite a bit like myself and June. I also beleive in the "without growth there is stagnation" philosophy. Thanks again for responding and I love your blog as well!
ReplyDelete:) Very welcome, I tend to ramble on and on when I connect with something. I guess you could tell this post spoke to me. Lol
DeleteThe more I talk to Ms. June, the more I believe that as well. We both have the awesomest Daddies ever.
And thank you, I'm still in the process of adding the writings that mean a lot to me.