Wednesday, November 28, 2012

Communication and asking for what we need



                                                    


Like many men, I don't like to talk a lot..... Also like many men I don't like asking for help or directions when I feel that I should be able to navigate the challenges of life and the privileges of being an HoH with grace and honor.  If I have learned anything and could pass anything along to my fellow HoH's and even ladies in the DD universe, I'd tell them that sometimes it takes a big man (or woman) to ask for the help they need.


Being stubborn only adds to the distinct possibility of a breakdown in abundantly clear communication, which as I am sure you are all aware is the tangible root of many problems in a relationship.





                                                   

I fondly recall roadtrips when I was a child.  It's almost a stereotype, but I remember my father cursing under his breath with my mom trying to read a map upside down and emploring him to stop at the next gas station and just ask for directions.  It is my view that sometimes, the best thing a guy or gal can do for the relationship is to put their pride aside and do right, by not just their partner, not just themself, but the relationship.  Communication must be a constant and thoughtful process that considers the long term effects of the decision making process. Just as stone makes ripples in a quiet pool, so are the ramifcations of our decisions.


 Again as a man, and in particular a relatively manly man, I take pride in being big and physical and I also take pride in my brain and the benefit of a good education. Between those two things, sometimes it falls on me to recognize when I am letting my ego get in the way of being an effective leader. June and I share a partnership and I definitely realize that she is in fact better at some things than I am and vice-versa. Despite a somewhat natural competitive streak and perhaps something of a dominance thing (yeah I know, gasp right?!), I've learned that our relationship functions best when I make the kind of decisions that bolstor unity, teamwork, and togetherness.
                                                               
                                     
                                 

                                                



 Somtimes, negativity and stress can also get in the way of proper communication. I've had to learn to leave the world at the door before crossing the threshold, and even when it isn't possible for me to do so. I know that I can count on June to be there for me and to help me get me where I need to be. I have also found that it was extremley good for me to learn to turn to her and ask her to listen, to be there for me and to give me that which gets me what I need. It's gotten to the point where we are very good at reading each other and in fact are quick to give the other what they need before the other has to ask. Whether that be a place to vent, a word of encouragement, a cuddle session on the couch, passionate love making or a good otk session... We have both learned that asking can be a wonderful thing.






                                                             













It isn't an overnight process, nor is it one that we can afford to rush or take lightly. June and I feel that though it may not always have been the easy thing to do, learning to ask for the help we need to thrive in our relationship is one of the best things we could do for our communication process and our relationship. We would encourage everyone to explore the benefits of  an "ask early, ask often" relationship.













Her POV:

I have been blessed in more ways than one with Ward....more like a hundred thousand. We have an uncommon understanding of each other. Sometimes it is hard to ask for what we need. I am blessed in that no matter how I ask, he understands. If I use my words, obviously he understands, even if I am unable to articulate the why, if I just express the need, he understands. Sometimes it is my behavior, if I am restless or hyper-critical of myself or my efforts, he pulls me in, talks, observes, and uses his understanding of me to evaluate what I need from him. Sometimes it is wordless. Sometimes I will just climb onto his lap, bury my face against his neck, or lay across his lap, and with love and dedication, he will give me what it is that I need most.

Daddy does talk a good bit. He does not easily share his troubles. I try to gently remind him that that is what I am there for, that we are partners, and that he is not in this alone. It has taken some gentle and persistent effort, but he has gone from coming back to me the next day, to a few hours later, to sharing more immediately. My remedies for him? Much the same, but the healing energy comes from me instead of to me. I will sit on his lap and minister to him, or read his stoic, 'clean' responses and coax the words from him, or hand him the hairbrush and lay across his lap.

I will be quick to tell you that Ward has a concrete sense of self, he IS a manly man (he makes me melt!), but he is also the most genuinely open, least ego-driven men I have ever known. Every decision he makes has always had the welfare of this family, our children and myself at the very heart. And as I write this something occurs to me....

I'm sure you have noticed a few seemingly painfully introspective posts from Ward. And like a bolt from the blue, I gained an understanding...Daddy is in negotiations regarding his career...he asked for my input last night, and I gave it, and clarified it this morning....and I told him I support him in whatever he chooses to do, and that I know he will make the right decision for our family, and just to wait till they present it in writing, so they can't renege on the promises made, as they have before. So if you will all forgive me, I finished my last shift, and am finishing my POV, as he requested...and right now, my Daddy needs me to sit on his lap and wrap my arms around him, tell him that I love him and trust him and his leadership, and coax the heaviness from his heart.

Monday, November 26, 2012

Things I struggle with (HoH Edtion)




                                           


   I'm not a perfect person... no there are many things I wish that I didn't do. In this most beautiful journey I have learned so very much, not just about June and her needs, but my own as well. I have discovered that there is much more to me than even I would have dared to guess. June has been, and continues to be my greatest inspiration, my greatest blessing and the greatest gift the Lord has ever seen fit to grace me with. She makes me want to be a better man, and sometimes this leads me to take examine my heart of hearts and perform the sometimes difficult task of working on some of the things that I struggle with. I'd love to be able to say that I've handled everything with grace, dignity and an unselfish heart.  Sadly, this has not always been so. I have had to learn that being the head of home comes with a lot of responsibility and to fall short in this responsibility is to fail his family.




                                                


  I guess it doesn't exactly make me unique or shocking, but I worry about being the best dad I can be for our children. I'm sure that you recall June mentioning that our children are in fact special needs and this can be a challenge in the best of times. They are beautiful, loud, boisterous, active and engaging boys... I am loathe to admit it, but sometimes after work I find them challenging. Sometimes all I want to do is come in give June a kiss and a hug, sit down and watch Sportscenter.

I have learned that being a good dad means taking time to listen, and to be involved in a child's education. When I came into June's life, I knew that I needed to make a positive impact on the life of these two beautiful boys,  they were hungry for male energy, they needed discipline, love and the encouragement of seeing a happy, healthy relationship. I hope that one day they can say that I've done a good job of raising them into good men who are productive members of our society. I worry that sometimes I am too stern with them, and that I push them a little hard, but at the end of a long day seeing their smiling faces lifts my heart.




                                                             
                                                
  
June's love and affection have changed me for the better and as stated previously, she makes me want to be a better man for her. I recall the times when I could have used better words, or found a way to be more supportive, and I cringe at my rapidity and my  lack of sensitivity.  I want to be the man the Lord would have me be for her. To lead a family, to be a good father, a good husband is not enough... I want to be the best I can be for them and I hope that I grow to be a better leader and a better example.  The love of family is a sweet, spicy drug that I am addicted to... it's sultry essence flows through me and inspires my deepest heart.

                                                       

Discipline in this community often times has a negative or corrective connotation, but for us it is not always so.  For us discipline is  a choice, it is bond, it is that which draws us together, what helps us overcome our greatest obstacles and ensures we stay on a path that speaks to our love as a couple and family.  Sometimes this means recognizing the subtle signs of her stress at the end of the work day.  Sometimes it means her taking my hand and giving me the chance to shake off bad emotions before they can creep into our happy home. Sometimes, knowledge doesn't make things any easier does it?  Knowing what one needs or what one needs to do doesn't always make things any easier or fun.... but that's the beauty of it.  Seeing her smile, seeing that radiance... She's my reason and her love inspires even when task seems long at days end. She also knows me, she knows my heart and she knows that sometimes, stress can get the better of me.  Thankfully she doesn't let that happen any more than I do... many times she has put the hairbrush in my hand and lain across my lap, somehow knowing what I needed before I did.



 
                                                  


I know that I don't deserve any of this, my family is a gift, the highest act of grace from the Lord above and even when I struggle, even when I don't handle things well their love humbles and blesses me.  Even through stress and doubt and the scars of the past I continue to learn as much as I teach.It is an honor to be a teacher, a protector, a provider, to the finest woman in this land, and the two best kids anyone could ever ask for.  It isn't always an easy job, but in it I find my finest hours and my deepest blessings






                                               



Her POV
*Smiles*
I think that my Man is much too hard on himself. But I think that that is part of the magic that keeps us each serving the other. I am grateful for the things that he brings to us, and I completely understand wanting to be the best that he can be...I also want to be the best that I can be for him and for our family. He was not used to children. He was used to grown men who were pretty much unquestioningly obedient... and me, who is the same, lol. He had expressed this concern to me, so we worked out a system. I will not correct him in front of the children. I believe in presenting a united front. If he kind of starts shifting to the Navy Boot Camp kind of child-rearing method, I simply lay a hand on his arm, and he dials back. I think that's pretty awesome.
 He has also changed me for the better. He has made me stronger. He has made me a better, more confident mother. He has made me happier. My therapist remarked on what a difference from when I started therapy to now, and going back over the charts and her notes and things, the change started when Ward entered our lives. The deeper we fell, the better things got. For the first time in my life, I know that someone truly loves me just because I exist, that he has my back. He provides me with love, safety, security, structure, support...simple things that I am only enjoying for the first time in my life. 
I have seen both of us blossom with joy. Neither of us was a very...relaxed or humor-filled person before. Now we love to laugh. We find humor in small things. And it is amazingly freeing to collapse into giggle fits, both of us with tears running out of our eyes. Our children love to watch, they love to participate, and they love to tease us. Our youngest things it's amazing to see us kiss. He gets the wryest look on his face, a big grin and says, "I guess you're gonna kiss now!", or "AGAIN?!" Yup! lol!

Discipline, as Ward says, is an integral part of our journey, of our dynamic. We don't see it as a negative ... we don't even see correction as a negative, frankly, as it serves to restore order and equilibrium and to clear the air. We view discipline as essential to maintaining an even keel, to keeping our roles well defined, to keeping the need to serve each other at the fore of our minds. If I need his help with stress, he gives it willingly, and it is his choice if this comes in the form of pleasure, or simply cuddling, or discipline. I do seem to interpret his signals equally as well, and I will offer whatever comfort he needs, be it a massage, some gentle caressing and cuddling, or offering him my bottom. I am his woman, I am his little girl, I am his submissive, I am his to use as he needs, his to use as he sees fit. 

I am by no means perfect. But somehow I am perfect for him. I fill the needs that have left him empty for a lot of his life. And he - he completes me in ways I never thought possible. No, he may not be perfect. But he IS perfect for me. He is everything I have ever dreamed of and thought out of reach. He is love and healing and learning. He's mine. And I thank God every moment of every day for him.

Saturday, November 24, 2012

Family and the Holidays...



 
                                              


Sometimes it's the first rays of the sun shining on her face.  Somtimes it's the raucous sound of laughter and the shuffle of little feet upstairs.  Somtimes it's the peaceful realization that  everything that the media would espouse as great or neccessary is so much less than the media would have me believe.  Traditionally, the holiday season has been rather difficult for me.  Even if I wasn't deployed, or in a strange part of the world, I have worked during Thanksgiving, Christmas, New Years, and Valentines day way more times than I'd like to admit. The Lord has shown me his grace and mercy through it all and has given me the greatest blessing a man could ever ask for.



                                                          







Having said all that. I am extremly excited for the chance to be spend the holidays with the family.  Christmas carols, lucious food, tossing around the ol' pigskin and snuggling up on the couch with a big bowl of popcorn.  I guess it sounds kind of corny, but the later months of the year really are my favorite  time of the year.   Gratuitous amounts of comfort food,  pick up basketball games, the apex  of college football.... The chill of the rainy nights are all part of the beauty that comes with late Autumn/early Winter.



                                                                        





 
 
                                                           
                                                                            

 Some people think it is cheesy and I'm not saying that they are wrong, but one of my favorite parts of    the holiday season  is of course Christmas music!  I love the festive sound, and the warmth that many of these old songs bring.   Being military I think my favorite is "I'll be home for christmas"  (Cliche I know) These songs often portray the unstoppable ideas of love and family and that is somthing that endures in our house regardless of the time of year or material possessions.  The festive atmosphere, the decorations, the lights, and of course the warmth of  true love and sacrifice put a big ol' smile on my face just about every day of the week.


                                                            




I'd love to take this opportunity to invite you to come inside, take off your coat and shoes, get comfy and share with us your favorite holiday traditions. What are your favorite holiday memories? What are you favorite holiday songs?  Enjoy a heaping bowl of comfort and share with us your favorite part of the holidays.  I know it's kind of early, but from us to you,  A big ol' happy holidays from Ward and June!!!







                                            
                                                                 

Her POV
Céad míle fáilte romhat!
Mmmm - favorite Christmas Carol?




This is both my favorite carol, and my favorite version (yes all things Irish - Nollaig shona duit!). 

I agree wholeheartedly with Ward. The things that I prize.. having him here with us this holiday. Having the kids run in to tell us Santa has come, and hopping into the bed with us to open stockings. One of our traditions, when they have finally fallen asleep, and all the gifts are under the tree, sneaking into their room and leaving their stockings at the foot of the beds...so they see on opening their eyes that Santa has been there. It's great fun for us, lying in bed, listening to the excited voices exclaiming over bubbles and chapstick, 'fancy pencils', erasers, candy and other little baubles, before they are ready for the main event. 

After the whirlwind of paper and excited voices, cuddling with him on the sofa, over a cup of chai, and watching them settle into a rhythm, where they can really begin to appreciate the bounty. Then sharing a late brunch, and relaxing together, putting together some of the things, playing with others, breaking into one of the board games. All of us together...in the same room...this is heaven. This is the thing I have prayed for, and I thank God for blessings given. 

What will be my greatest gift this year? To wake to the sound of the boys voices, and to feel Ward's heat at my back, to hear his breathing as he drifts up out of sleep, to feel his arm drape over my body and pull me close, and whisper against my neck - Merry Christmas, little one....Heaven! 

I wish all of you your greatest desire come true. I wish you hope, joy,  love and abundant blessings. 

 
 Nollaig shona duit. Athbhliain faoi mhaise duit. Sláinte chugat agus bail ó Dhia ort 
 Merry Christmas. Happy New Year. Health to you and the blessings of God on you.

Wednesday, November 21, 2012

Happy Anniversary, My Heart








                                                                                 


Dear true love
I'm a writer without any words
I'm a story that nobody heard
When I'm without you

I am a voice
I am a voice without any sound
I'm a treasure map that nobody found
When I'm without you

Dear true love
I'm a lantern without any light
I'm a boxer much too afraid to fight
When I'm without you

So with this ring
May you always know one thing
What little that I have to give
I will give it all to you
You're my one true love

I am a memory
I'm a memory bent out of shape
A childhood already bruised with age
When I'm without you

Dear true love
I'm an artist without any paint
I'm the deal that everyone breaks
When I'm without you

I am a whisper
I'm a secret that nobody keeps
I'm a dreamer of someone else's dreams
When I'm without you

Dear true love
I'm a farewell that came all too soon
I'm a hand-me-down that dreams of being new
When I'm without you




i've waited a hundred years. but i'd wait a million more for you. nothing prepared me for what the privilege of being yours would do.
if i had only felt the warmth within your touch, if i had only seen how you smile when you blush, or how you curl your lip when you concentrate enough, i would have known what i was living for all along. what i've been living for.
[ From: http://www.metrolyrics.com/turning-page-lyrics-sleeping-at-last.html ] your love is my turning page, where only the sweetest words remain. every kiss is a cursive line, every touch is a redefining phrase.
i surrender who i've been for who you are, for nothing makes me stronger than your fragile heart. if i had only felt how it feels to be yours, well, i would have known what I've been living for all along. what i've been living for.
though we're tethered to the story we must tell, when i saw you, well, i knew we'd tell it well. with a whisper, we will tame the vicious seas. like a feather bringing kingdoms to their knees.

Read more: SLEEPING AT LAST - TURNING PAGE LYRICS
 
I’ve waited a hundred years
But I’d wait a million more for you
Nothing prepared me for
What the privilege of being yours would do

If I had only felt the warmth within your touch
If I had only seen how you smile when you blush
Or how you curl your lip when you concentrate enough
Well I would have known
What I was living for all along
What I’ve been living for

Your love is my turning page
Where only the sweetest words remain
Every kiss is a cursive line
Every touch is a redefining phrase

I surrender who I’ve been for who you are
For nothing makes me stronger than your fragile heart
If I had only felt how it feels to be yours
Well I would have known
What I’ve been living for all along
What I’ve been living for

Though we’re tethered, to the story we must tell
When I saw you, well I knew we’d tell it well
With the whisper, we will tame the vicious scenes
Like a feather, bringing kingdoms to their knees



i've waited a hundred years. but i'd wait a million more for you. nothing prepared me for what the privilege of being yours would do.
if i had only felt the warmth within your touch, if i had only seen how you smile when you blush, or how you curl your lip when you concentrate enough, i would have known what i was living for all along. what i've been living for.
[ From: http://www.metrolyrics.com/turning-page-lyrics-sleeping-at-last.html ] your love is my turning page, where only the sweetest words remain. every kiss is a cursive line, every touch is a redefining phrase.
i surrender who i've been for who you are, for nothing makes me stronger than your fragile heart. if i had only felt how it feels to be yours, well, i would have known what I've been living for all along. what i've been living for.
though we're tethered to the story we must tell, when i saw you, well, i knew we'd tell it well. with a whisper, we will tame the vicious seas. like a feather bringing kingdoms to their knees.

Read more: SLEEPING AT LAST - TURNING PAGE LYRICS


My soul was made to love you. Swimming in a 
sea of confusion,waiting, waiting, till He thought 
we were ready- burnished by this life. Now that 
I have found you, we are joined in this life and 
in each one that follows, for all of eternity. My 
heart was made to be loved by you. You make 
it whole, complete it. You are my puzzle piece.





I have never just trusted... until you. I have never
invited anyone inside... until you. I have never been
touched so gently I had to cry... until you.  You are
my proof that I am not alone. It will never be better
than the first moment knowing you....and every
moment that comes after...until the world stops
turning, and into the ether.




Breathe out so I can breathe you in
(New Zealand Maori sharing in the 
sacred act of hongi, exchanging 
the ha or breath of life)
Photo: New Zealand Maori sharing in the sacred act of hongi, exchanging the ha or breath of life.
      
                                                                                         







I give my life to you, and accept the gift
of your life with a grateful and humble heart.






HIS POV:   Oh lover! 

In what light have I missed this life?
Each day your unfettered grace surrounds the light
The sweet soft essence of love day or night,
available for the asking, heart mine for the taking
your essence  bring me life   and your beauty surrounds the sweet ambrosia of your love and submission

You brought me back from dark Acheron's ferry
and with the light and beauty of Venus you enriched the fertile plains of our love
You lift me from the frail, weak shadow of mere mortal man
your love surrounds, and builds me into passionate form

My heart and life are yours to own,
Each ray of the sun a gift to honor our commitment
My greatest treasure radiant in love... always and forever.

~BTL  "Oh Lover"



Tuesday, November 20, 2012

A Season for Giving Thanks

We're closing in rapidly on Thanksgiving here in the US (our Canadian friends celebrated 10-8-12), so naturally thoughts turn to the things for which we are thankful. OFM had a lovely post last week, Stardust Exposed by an Attitude of Gratitude, in which he talks about how to develop an attitude of gratitude.


I have always tried to be that way. I'm the odd one who calls to say - Hey, I just got great service! Or - Wow, that was the best meal I had in ages! I think people complain a lot and forget to give thanks. So, many years ago, I made the decision to recognize things that brought light. I also try to remember that while I don't have abundance, I have more than a lot of people.




When I want to grumble because I have to do another load of laundry (seriously, the stuff breeds! I can finish three loads a day, pull the last load from the dryer, turn around and the hamper is full again!), I instead give thanks that I have clothes to wash, our own washer and dryer (2nd hand but they work!), and a house to keep the clothes and appliances in. When I want to complain about cleaning, I remember instead to give thanks that I have a house to clean for my family. When I don't want to cook, I give thanks for the food, the cookware and the fuel that allows me to feed my family.




Our children have SPD, they are sometimes difficult to manage, overly loud, and melt down quite a bit. But they are beautiful, smart, they have smiles that light up the world, possess laughter in their souls that bubbles over like exuberant, refreshing water over river rocks, and brings joy and laughter to Ward and myself. And despite the challenges, and sometimes the downright discomfort they experience, they are the personification of joy, and our family would not be the same without them. They were my first experience with unconditional love. I give thanks to God for them- two of my three greatest gifts, because of who they are and because they came late in life with an ease that was a blessing. And they continue to bless us every day.




I thank our children for bringing joy and laughter into our lives. I thank them for teaching us to look at the world through fresh, unencumbered eyes. I thank them for showing us beauty in the mundane. I thank them for teaching me how to shed my inhibitions and just BE in this single moment of time. I thank them for teaching me that I know how to love with all of my heart and without fear. I thank them for teaching us patience, and for making us better people.






I give thanks that my God saw fit to bring Ward into our lives. I thought that I was destined to a life alone. Then came this man who loves me so completely, who doesn't ask me to change for him, but instead takes my hand and says "Come, grow with me."; this man who sees into my soul, and gives me what I need even when I don't know what I need. I thank him for loving perfectly imperfect me.







 


I thank my Ward for the simple things he does, every day, going to work, sitting down next to me and grabbing clothes out of the basket and helping me fold, taking the dishes out of my hand and saying - sit you cooked, for giving me a little bit of time every day to relax and have mommy time, for the occasional girl's day out, for taking time with the boys every single day, for massages (never had one before Ward), for foot rubs and for painting my nails, for doing the grocery shopping with me and helping with the bags and the putting away, wrapping his arms around me every night, for never letting me forget for one single moment that he appreciates the little things I offer him, and that he loves me fierce.


I thank my Ward for being everything that I need and more. I thank him for making me strong, and finding more in myself than I ever imagined I had inside. I thank him for his hand in mine. I thank him for loving me enough to provide discipline and correction to purge all that does not belong between us, for providing us with a clean slate and for his grace and forgiveness. I thank him for showing me the good inside myself and teaching me that I deserve love, and acceptance. I thank him for the gift of laughter. I thank him for the genuine joy that he brings.


I thank him for loving the children I brought into our relationship as if they were his own, and for the light I see in their eyes when they are with him, and the example that he provides to them, how to be a strong, valorous, compassionate, honorable, loving man. I thank him for the family that I have always longed for, and thought would always be just outside my grasp.







 I thank my God for the richness of friendship in this community. I thank Him for wealth that goes well beyond the material. I thank Him for enough - we may not have a lot - but we always have enough. I thank Him for a full heart, and love beyond imagination, I thank Him for light, and for lifting me up and letting me find my home.

We wish you peace and blessings today and every day.

HIS POV:
I am so very thankful for the opportunity, privilege and blessing to have such a beautiful family. I agree wholeheartedly with June on making it a point to thank people and services for exemplary service and attention to their craft. I have so much to be grateful for so many blessings that it is hard to begin.

- Our children light up our world and even with their exuberance, they are such a beautiful and bright part of our world... I love them as they are... they are my sons, and I love the opportunity to be a dad again. (long story, perhaps I'll post about it someday).

- Our love is a blessing beyond what I could ever ask for. I know that I don't deserve June, but the Lord's grace and abundance abound, every day is richer and brighter and I thank June so much for letting me be a part of something so beautiful that it defies words.

-  I thank the Lord yet again for the depth and richness that we share that is a world unto itself. June, I thank you for being the one to draw me out into the light, and help my heart heal so I could love again. I am thankful for every moment that we have shared along the way and I'd do it all again. A man could not ask for more than the gifts that you have given me.

We are truly blessed and we want to thank each and every one of you guys that read and even our lurkers, for sharing the journey and much needed insight along the way!  Thank you one and all and we wish the Lord's many blessing on you and yours!



Sunday, November 18, 2012

The Liebster Award Pt 2- Random facts about Ward & June and our questions for our nominees!




  • When one receives the award, one posts 11 random facts about oneself and answers the 11 questions asked by the person who nominated you.
  • Pass the award onto 11 other blogs (while making sure one notifies the blogger that one nominated them!)
  • One writes up 11 NEW questions directed towards YOUR nominees.
  • One is not allowed to nominate the blog who nominated one's own blog!
  • One pastes the award picture into one's blog. (You can google the image, there are plenty of them


11 Random Facts About Ward:
  • I snore
  • I don't like butter
  • I love classic tv shoes
  • I love to read
  • I wish there was a holiday for spankos
  • I wish Borders never closed
  • I think Adele is attractive but shouldn't sing
  • I wear glasses
  • I love peanut butter but hate peanuts
  • I love hard cider
  • I think Sarah Silverman needs daily spankings



11 Random Facts About June:
  • I enjoy the movies we take the children too more than they do :)
  • I love to garden
  • I love to bake, and would love to open a bakery
  • I hate shoes 
  • Socks make me mad when they bunch up under my toes, and make my feet hot
  • I love to read, Dean Koontz is my favorite author
  • I love poetry, favorite poets: Walt Whitman, ee cummings, Nikki Giovanni, Rita Dove
  • I love lima beans in soup but not alone on a plate
  • I would/have never give(n) to another person all the things that I give to Ward
  • I love the ocean (I want to be married on the beach, at sunrise with bare feet)
  • I could eat spinach, tomatoes and roasted asparagus everyday

And now our questions for you!
We have nominated: Christina, Grace, Tess, Roz, Riley, LucyLou, Fondles, Susie, tori, Bas and last but certainly not least lil.


1. What is your favorite pizza topping?
2. What is your favorite eye color?
3. Who is your favorite actor/actress?
4. What is your favorite song to sing in the shower?
5. What is your favorite way to connect with your partner?
6. Who is your favrite Author
7.  What is your favorite spanking memory?
8.  Who do you find inspirational?
9.  What is your favorite article of clothing?
10.  If you could meet a famous person (living or dead), who would you have dinner with?
11.  If you could have any one wish, what would it be?

The Liebster Award- Part 1


We are very humbled and honored to have been nominated for the Liebster Award by Dana, Fiona and SunnyGirl and Bluebird.

  • When one receives the award, one posts 11 random facts about oneself and answers the 11 questions asked by the person who nominated you.
  • Pass the award onto 11 other blogs (while making sure one notifies the blogger that one nominated them!)
  • One writes up 11 NEW questions directed towards YOUR nominees.
  • One is not allowed to nominate the blog who nominated one's own blog!
  • One pastes the award picture into one's blog. (You can google the image, there are plenty of them!

Dana's questions:


1.  What is your favorite kind of ice cream.  
Ward: Strawberry
June: Pralines & Cream
2.  What is your favorite memory of your spouse/significant other?  
Ward: The first time we met
June: The first time I heard his voice
3.  Where would you like to travel if you could go anywhere in the world?  
Ward: Great Britain
June: Ireland - the west coast
4.  What is your favorite color? 
Ward: Green
June: Purple!
5.  Roller coaster or water rides?  
Ward: Roller coaster's all the way!
June: Water rides!
6.  Beach or the mountains?  
Ward: Mountains near the beach (it's what I live next to!)
June: What he said :) I dreamed of a place like that since I was a little girl!
7.  What brought you to TTWD?  
Ward: The spanking lifestyle, and old fashioned beliefs
June: I started by exploring a spanking lifestyle and landed here. It is what feels right for me.
8.  What do you like best about yourself? 
Ward: I am a kind person who loves to help others
June: I am compassionate and empathetic
9.  Cat lover or dog lover?  
Ward: Cat lover for sure!
June: Cat lover
10.  Describe yourself in one word?  
Ward: Sleepy!
June: Shy
11. Would you attend a social gathering of folks who practice DD?   
Ward: hmmmm... Maybe
June: what he said :)

Fiona's questions:

1.  What's your favorite implement for spanking?   
Ward: My own two hands.
June: Daddy's hands and the yummy strap
2.  What is your favorite dessert?  
Ward: Key Lime Pie
June: pecan pie 
3.  What's your favorite toy in your arsenal?  
Ward: My trusty hair brush
June: It wouldn't be a spanking without Daddy's brush, but I do love that yummy strap :) 
4.  What is your favorite sport (whether to play or watch)?  
Ward: Football
June: Ice Hockey 
5.  City life or country life?  
Ward: Certified country boy here.
June: Country girl here 
6.  What's your favorite pair of shoes?  
Ward: My Sneakers
June: none - shoes just make me mad

7.  Are you with a significant other?  If so, for how long?  
Ward: Yes, 2 Years
June: Yes :) 2 years 
8.  Swallow, spit or pull out?  (either you do or have your partner do) 
Ward: She swallows
June:  :"> I do swallow
9.  What would your motto be? 
Ward: Love, Laughter, Life on the next level
June: Love, trust, honor, grace 
10.  Most interesting class you ever took in school?   
Ward: Psychology 
June: Psychology (my major)
11.  Describe your kink in 11 words or less.   
Ward: Domestic Discipline, with an advanced appreciation for all things spanking
June: Traditional male-led, domestic discipline,spanko

SunnyGirls Questions:

1.   Do you prefer coffee or tea?    
Ward:Tea
June: Tea (chai - yum!)
2.   Are you democrat, republican or independent?  
Ward: Democrat with Republican leanings
June: Registered Democrat - centrist/moderate
3.   What's your favorite part of the country? 

Ward: South
June: What he said
4.   How do you eat an Oreo cookie?  

Ward: In a few bites
June: I eat the top cookie off, lick off the cream, then eat the bottom cookie. 
5.   Do you prefer to drive or fly when traveling? 

Ward: Drive
June: Drive
6 .  When do you open your Christmas presents?  

Ward: Christmas morning
June: What he said
7.   What's your favorite time of year?  

Ward: Autumn
June: Spring and Fall
8.   Do you prefer to read actual books or use an E reader? 

Ward: Both
June: E-reader for school, a book in hand for pleasure
9.   How do you prefer being spanked?    

Ward: I am a spanker, not a spankee
June: OTK, or on the bed over pillows with him beside me and his arm across my back
10. Were you urged to write/blog by PK?   

Ward: No
June: No, by my Daddy.
11.  What kind of car do you drive?
   
Ward: Toyota Camry
June: A Mazda MPV  (soccer mom car)

And BlueBird's


 1. What did you want to be when you were little?
Ward: A Chef
June: A veterinarian (well when I was 5 I wanted to be a glass-blowing nun :-P)
2. If you could meet someone famous who is still living who would it be?
Ward: Rachel Ray
June: Hmmmm - Robin Williams
3. If you could meet someone famous who was dead who would it be? 
Ward: Abraham Lincoln
June: JFK
4. What kind of car do you drive?
Ward: Toyota Camry
June:  Mazda MPV
5. Where is your favorite spot in the world? 
Ward: Anywhere June is (AWWWWW - thank you, Daddy-love!)
June: At Ward's side
6. Is there one thing you wish you could change about yourself?
Ward: I wish I were more patient.
June: I wish I were smarter.
7. If you could get close and touch a wild animal, which one would you want to touch and why?
Ward: No, they are wild animals for a reason and the less human interaction the better.
June: A tiger!
8. Do you like hot or cold weather?
Ward: Cold
June: Warm, lol - I like temperate weather like spring and fall.
9. Coffee or tea?
Ward: Tea
June: Tea
10. What is your favorite cuisine?
Ward:All!
June: Hmmm, don't think I have a favorite, like Italian, Latino, Thai, some East Indian.
11. What is your shoe size?
Ward: Men's 14
June: Ladies 10-11

Our questions for our nominees to follow in part 2!