Sunday, January 27, 2013

The positive effects of a good spanking

They never ask the right question. “Will it hurt?” Yes, it will hurt. It will hurt because it is real—we are not playing a game, but this is the wrong question. The question you should be asking me is, “What will I do when I start craving it? When I want it again? When it fills my mind so that it is all I can think about, day and night—when it consumes me? When I would do anything to get it again? What then?” Then, pretty eyes… then, you are mine.



Have you ever sat and considered the impact of a evening devoted to a good, thorough spanking and  earth-shaking love-making and pleasure?  Normally this is something that we probably wouldn't talk about here, but the potential benefits are worth discussing and using.  Throughout the time that June and I have written this blog, we have come to understand that several folks out there are... what's the term?  "spank-nos".  Even still, when we consider the impact that stress can have, we must understand the value that a good firm spanking can bring to the table.  I tell June all the time and I think it's worth repeating here.... Good girls get firm spankings too, it helps them stay good, and in combination to deep, truly connective  intimacy that  smooths away the aches and stresses of the day and bring us to that special place that can only be reached by a man being intimate with his woman.  Stress relief spanking require a lot of forethought and communication. It should be made clear that this is not correction or punishment, but in fact a conduit for relief and rebalance through the vigorous application of positive and direct energies.  It also becomes necessary to find (or make) time to get the most out of this carefully considered time.




 Making love is clearly an important part of any healthy relationship. I think some people don't realize it's true value and in some instances, might minimize or underrate the worth of spending quality time giving and receiving pleasure from our partners.  There is something very spiritual about making love, in addition to the sights and sounds that make our blood boil and our passions rise, it seems only fitting that sex can open many doors, heal many wounds, smooth over feelings and reconnect after periods of heightened stress and emotion.  The true value of physical release is in the freedom it brings, us.  Less talking, less thinking, passion and unconditional embrace - these things are always important.



The following section is just a series of suggestions.  We'd highly recommend trying one or more of these out!


relationship

 If you don't already June and I would highly recommend establishing a "Date Night".   Find a sitter, have the kids spend the night with Grandma etc... Go see a movie, go watch dinner, Redbox it, go bowling, spend some time laughing, and celebrating the unique bond that you share.  Spend some time giving her a bubble bath or a pedicure and really spend some time pampering her... Relaxation is the key here.





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Before you give her the spanking she needs, spend some time spoiling her, talk to her, let her know that she has your complete and undivided attention. When the time comes, take her in hand and give her the spanking she needs. By the spanking that she needs, I mean take the time to observe her, know her body language and the weight of her heart... Drive out the stress and take the time to show her that this is as important to you as it is for her.  No distractions, no half-hearts only pure and unblemished love.  Hold her close, let her emote, and let the stress vanish with the conviction of your hearts.








Give her the time she needs to  feel it, hold her in your arms and be there for her. Leave only room for love and light..... Kiss her slow and soft, and then let your love for each other and your bodies do all of the talking.







We think spanking can be a very useful and wonderful part of a healthy relationship. Even in the context of pleasure and stress relief we find new meaning and a wonderful use of time and passion. We recommend it!



                                            

Her POV:
When I suffer stress, or when I suffer emotional pain, I need to be spanked. It is a way - for me - to take the emotional pain and transfer it to flesh - and poof - all gone. A calm relaxed girl who can move through the day without the heaviness in my heart, not feeling guilt if I feel I have been short or less than I wish to be, or my heart is just not where I like it to be. At those times the greatest gift he can give me is the gift of release.

I am a very fortunate girl. Daddy is very sensitive to my mood. And generally he will approach me and whisper in my ear that he knows what I need, and that he will take good care of me...and he always does. Other times I may text or email him at work, and tell him I need his help when he gets home. And sometimes, it's simply a way for us to reconnect after a long week of chores and responsibilities, school - his, mine, the boys'  - for me to feel his delicious control, and for me to be able to bend. That for me is heaven, that puts my brain in that light, dreamy place. It lets me relinquish the negativity that seeps in, and absorb Daddy's love and light. It lets us start fresh and rejuvenated. And it lets this insomniac sleep sweet and undisturbed. For that gift, for his attention and devotion, I am grateful.

34 comments:

  1. Well we know that June is not part of the "spank-no" crowd (after the implement tour, I was hurting! lol) However, I do agree there are some benefits to a good spanking that only come that way. Great post!

    Hugs

    p

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    1. *innocent blink* me??? Hurting just from the tour? Really? lol silly girl, P :) They really do strip us down and make it easier to have the spiritual and emotional intimacy that we treasure.

      (((hugs)))

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  2. Excellent post! I have to share this one with Fireman :)

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    1. Thanks, elle, we're glad you found something helpful :)

      (((hugs)))

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  3. Ya know, in the circles we all frequent, I often feel that this kind of spanking is not okay. I am increasingly surprised and comforted to see how much alike we are June. The Man is coming to terms with the fact that this is what I need. I am going to send this post to him Ward. It is awesome for good men to receive counsel from other good men who speak wisdom. Again, thanks guys for baring your souls and making life for us (me especially) not feel so alone..

    Dana

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    1. Oh, thanks so much, Dana! I'm glad you feel at home. Sometimes I feel the same way,I feel like I don't really fit in anywhere. You're never alone, our mailbox & messenger's always open:)

      (((hugs)))

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  4. It still surprises me a little when I realize the sense of calmness, of peace...that comes over me after a spanking session...it seems like all is right with my world, at least for a short time. You two express yourselves so well....thanks for sharing your thoughts with all of us.
    hugs abby

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    1. That is so true, abby. I don't think anyone else in the world could understand that except women in this lifestyle - but spanking makes me feel safe, secure, calm, peaceful, and very, very loved.

      (((hugs)))

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  5. Wonderful post! Most definitely going to share with my hubby :)

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    1. Thanks very much, Tricia. We're glad you found it helpful :)

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  6. Another wonderful post!

    Even though I am a spankno, many of the feelings you described after a spanking struck a note with me. Sheesh you two, are you turning me into a spanko? LOL Oh well, I learned years ago to never say never so if I ever am lucky enough to meet another man who touches my heart, who knows, I just might become a spanko. ;)

    Thanks you for sharing such personal thoughts and feelings with all of us.

    Blessings,
    Cat

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    1. Hi, Cat :D Turning you into a spanko?:-O :D lol. It can be lots and lots of fun, and sometimes not - sometimes they are hard and stingy, but it's all the things that surround it, and how they deepen things for us that make it so worth it. Sometimes I need those hard,stingy ones, crave them - not that I enjoy them in the moment, but they do what I need them to do, and the reconnect is heavenly :)

      (((hugs)))

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  7. All well said. What you describe has probably made up 75% of the role of our spankings, even within our DD marriage. We learned that the more of this type of sparking we routinely engaged in, the less the need for discipline occurred.

    Sara

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    1. Welcome, Sara, thanks for reading. Yes, Daddy and I were just talking about that the other night. We've been together a bit over 2 years, and I've only been corrected 5 times. We find that aside from helping both of us cope with stress, and my insomnia, and being close, it lessens the need for correction.

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  8. I love this post! I especailly like the caption on the 1st picture (if you roll over it with your mouse)--I am so totally there right now. Ward--you have a wonderful way of very clearly explaining a weighty Dd issue. I will be showing this to PapĂ­. Thank you both for letting us peek at your beautiful life.

    MamĂ­

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    1. Hi Mami,thank you very much. I love the way Ward writes :) He most certainly has a way. I'm glad you found something helpful!

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  9. Oh, I love that you encourage date night. I think that is so important. Quality time is "love language" of mine so spending time with my spouse is important. But, I really loved the part about giving time also for the spanking and meeting those needs. Good Stuff Ward and June (as usual!) Have a good week.

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    1. Thanks, SNP. He is very wise indeed :) I am very lucky that Ward understands the value of quality time, and investing in us. It makes a huge difference.

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  10. Love everything here but the spanking part ;)

    We regularly go on date nights, and it's always been a very worthwhile use of our time. So important! Great post.

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    1. Hi Stormy, thanks for reading. Somehow it doesn't surprise me that you love everything but the spanking part, lol ;-) For me it is essential. I enjoy the feeling of being taken in his hand, I enjoy the feeling of bending for him.

      The connection is so very important and it must be nurtured. When everything else is said and done, and gone, we are left with each other. If we don't cultivate our relationships, all the sand will have run out and we will be left with empty hands.

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  11. i share your POV June, that it's a way to take the emotional stress and transfer it to a physical level and when I get my spanking that I need, it disappears and i'm left feeling lighter and more at peace internally.

    thanks for sharing!

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    1. Thanks, Fondles. I say that and mean that and worry that some might find it....demented,lol. But it is very real. No matter how 'widgey' conflicted, tumultuous I feel, when he takes the time to give me that good firm spanking it's all gone, and I am unburdened and free.

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  12. Another terrific post, and well said. We have date nights and it's always a wonderful time of connection.

    Hugs
    Roz

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    1. Thanks very much, Roz. They are wonderful. I like the meaningful little glances and whispers throughout the night, they make it yummier and help me feel very soft and submitted all night long.

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  13. Ward I agree so much with date night with four kids it was so important for us to have one night just for us no matter where we went. now that they are older we try to arrange it so everyone has plans on Friday nights, so that we can have the house alone. June I so agree with you. The sense of calm and peace that comes over me after a spanking really shocked me the first time. I was calmer than I had ever been in my life,. Ive always been a very high strung stressed out lady. Making love being the only thing that ever calmed me down after anyway haha. I am very grateful for your post because at first when this started and I asked him to spank away, he thought I had truly gone over the edge till the first time and then he saw what happend to me the next day more relaxed, happy less stressed. I just wish it lasted more than 24 hours. That would be even better. We cant do this everyday to many kids in the house, I mean who claps at the tv everynight.

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    1. Annie, you gave me the giggles - who claps at the tv every night, lol. We bought a white noise machine and put it in the boys' room and run a fan on high in our room. For us that has been very effective, and the boys are not heavy sleepers, but they don't hear a thing. We got it at Amazon. I can send you the link if you like.

      I have been the same way all my life as well. I have a very calm exterior - out of necessity - but inside, wow, churning like New Orleans at Mardi Gras. Yes, this has helped me to have more peace and security than I have ever known.

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  14. What a lovely post, Ward.
    This is an entirely different dimension to spanking than discipline or eroticism. It is giving a woman what she needs to make her soft and feminine. There are times when I haven't done anything needing correction, but I am relieved when Ian takes my hand and guides me to that place where I can let go of my tough exterior and let the woman in me blossom. I don't know what it is about me that makes it necessary for my bottom to be on fire, for that change to happen - but I guess that is the way I am made. Thank heavens my husband understands that.

    I am going to ask Ian to read this. I love the idea of being pampered like our old fashioned, fun maintenance used to be.
    hugs
    lillie

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    1. Oh, lillie-belle, me, too! It totally puts me in that calm, submissive, happy place. I try to understand this about myself. What was it about my past? Is it really genetic, cause I really did come like this, did environment add to it? But in the end it only matters that he understands, and is willing to give me what I need, and luckily that feeds him, too.

      It is delicious, and intimate and nurturing. Good luck with Ian :)

      (((hugs)))

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  15. Simply beautiful. I love getting your POV Ward. You two have a special relationship.

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    1. Thank you, Zoe :) I am very lucky, we have a very special relationship. I love when he posts, it gives me greater insight as well. I think sometimes when we write we get into things that might not otherwise surface.

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  16. @Pocahontas - A good spanking is a many splendored thing! Thanks for reading it!
    @elle - Thanks for reading, hope he finds it as captivating and interesting as you do!
    @Dana - We ceartinly agree, showing folks that a DD/TTWD relationship is still possible with the useage of conective and even fun based spankings is just one of our ideas!
    @sunnygirl - Thanks for reading! Always great to see you here!
    @abby - Thank you for reading and sharing some of our thoughts and ideas. Indeed a good spanking can clear the mind and heart and leave a strong sense of peace and satisfaction.
    @Tricia - Glad to be of service, Wishing you and your guy much inspiration!
    @Cat - Always glad to recieve your comments and share ours with you! Creeping spankoism mabey? ;)
    @findingsarah - Funny how that works out isn't it? Being truley connected, communicative, and bonded can only add strength to already strong relationships.
    @Mami - Thanks for joining us. I know it is a spanking blog but somtimes I think it is important to tackle these issues in persuit of greater and stronger bonds, relationships, and romance.
    @SNP - We put a lot into our relationship and we get so much out of it, Date night is a wonderful opportunity to remind ourselves of the importance of constantly working hard for each other and our relationship.
    @Stormy - Date night is an absolute must for us, with two very active young ones, we make it a priority to make time for each other.
    @Fondles - It took a while for me to understand that part of June, but I'm so glad that we put the time and effort into getting to and beyond that point, clearing the air, and bringing love to the surface is one of the most important thing a man can do for his lady.
    @Roz - aren't they though? Date nights aren't just fun and restorative, they bond and reaffirm our roles and of course bring delight, pleasure, and satisfaction.
    @Annie - That is why these times are so precious, and Clapping at the TV is almost like the popcorn that says "ouch" We are so glad that you got somthing out of this post!
    @ians mrs - The bond that June and I share, our roles, and helping her feel feminine and soft even when she is frazzled or has her hands full is one of the things that I adore doing with and for June!
    @Zoe - Smiles glad to share my POV, and we are very BLESSED!

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  17. Dear Ward and June
    A while back I started smelling smoke everywhere! I thought the house was on fire, but Daddy Jack didn't smell anything at all.
    This was so strange. I looked it up, but found no answers anywhere.
    Then I discovered that if I was overwhelmed or stressed, I began to smell smoke.
    Well, no smoke without fire, as they say.
    I asked Daddy Jack for a good spanking to relieve the stress and the smell disappeared.
    It seems my body knows when it needs a firm hand - and that is what I get.
    Isn't it amazing what a good spanking can do? :0)
    Thanks for a great blog
    Hugs
    Jack's Jill

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