Have you been or are you in a dominant/submissive dynamic relationship or is this new to you? Have you been in more than one D/s relationship? How were they the same? How were they different? What is unique about your relationships in your mind?
I have had Dominant play-partners in the past. This is what I would consider my first D/s-based relationship. I am a person who requires commitment to give myself fully. So I found having play-partners educational, but not in the least fulfilling. They were missing an emotional component, but they did prove that I had the capacity for this type of relationship. With those two partners, it was simply about learning my limits and abilities. I used my right to say no, I won't do that, you are a Dominant, but you are not my Dominant outside of play. And I used my safeword.With Daddy, there are leagues of difference in how it feels. I am his - completely - totally. I give him the gift of my surrender. I have no need to say no - I want to say yes to all that he could ever ask. I want to anticipate things he has not even imagined that he wants/needs/desires. I give him my love, my trust, my submission, my surrender, and the power of authority over me, and I know that he will never abuse that.
I understand the leaugues of difference you reference above. It's like some sort of pull that just lets you know you are in the right place. Sometimes Daddy will ask me what made me decide that he was the one I wanted to explore this with but I can never quite answer. I just know that I am his and even though it is really hard sometimes it just is.
ReplyDeleteIt is exactly that - a pull - there was something in him that touched my submission on a very deep level. It's like that line from Dirty Dancing "It's a feeling, a heartbeat. Don't try so hard. Breathe." When I stopped looking ('don't try so hard') this wonderful man walked into my life. He was so amazing that I was stunned, like someone kept very long in the dark, and deprived of the barest of necessities, suddenly gifted with cool, clear water, sweet air, gentle touch, and beautifully brilliant light to pierce the dark ('breathe'). He gave me so much, touched me so deep, that my heart opened for him ('It's a feeling, a heartbeat). He tended it and it blossomed, it blossoms still under his care.
ReplyDeleteThere will never be enough words to adequately and eloquently explain the way that belonging to him makes me feel. I'm just happy that others understand that exquisite feeling.